I’ve been privileged to be married for nearly 35 years to the most wonderful man in the world. On this Valentine’s Day, I’ve been reflecting on what makes a happy marriage. This is what I’ve learned.
Marry someone who is kind: There is no way to know what life will bring, but I always knew, no matter what happened that my husband would be good to me.
Marry someone who is smart … but don’t let him know exactly how smart you think he is: I like to say that I taught my husband everything he knows, but that’s not true. He’s one of the smartest, most engaged, most interesting people I have ever met. I improved him, of course, but that’s what a wife does.
Marry someone who will be a good parent: Parenting is a big part of marriage for most people and it helps to share it with someone who is a fabulous parent; my husband is an outstanding father. Whatever kind of parent I have been, I have been far better because of his advice, wisdom and patience, both with our children … and with me.
Marry your best friend: Ann Landers, an advice columnist who didn’t live to see the digital age, and is therefore someone you may have never heard of, used to say: “Love is friendship that has caught fire.” My husband was my friend long before we dated and he has remained by best friend ever since.
Don’t get married unless you can’t live without him. Our friends and family know the story of when I first declared that I could marry my husband … before I ever dated him. That shows you how sure I was that I could live with him, but I was equally sure that I could not live without him.
All the best things in my life come from my husband — our marriage, our children, our home, amazing experiences like family reunions and vacations to wonderful places … not to mention some really nice jewelry. He has made my life better in every possible way and I love him and need him more than mere words can say.
Happy Valentine’s Day! I hope everyone is spending the day with those you love.
